Giving gifts in Africa: Kini big deal? ( what`s the big deal)

A friend of mine buzzed me saying : hmmmm people go kill man with wedding gifts here ooh! How can you give somoene a gas bottle as a wedding gift? While I was rolling on the floor, laughing i thought ...why not? if the married couple need one , sure....I hope they have a gas cooker though!

And then i got to thinking about the weird gifts I have received and GIVEN! I am good at laughing at myself so I wont be shy to say...meeeen! Me too I don rub no be small!!

I remember in 1995 ( i think) our   english language teacher organised a raffle draw and each person you picked you were supposed to bring them a gift on valentine`s day..I saved up money and bought a nice brandnew T-shirt for my class-valentine, parcelled it and gave her.. In return she gave me 5-chewing gum!!!! I DI STILL VEX in 2014!!!LOL

That was in form 2 GBHS Bamenda. So guess what ? When we were in form 3, same thing was done. i picked a different girl`s name but i was already a wounded Valentine. As valentine`s approached i didint even have any money for a gift...i thought hard and decided between bringing her raw black beans ( heck she will cook it!) or going to my grandma and harvesting fruits! i finally decided on fruit and lo and behold on Valentine`s day I presented her with a PAWPAW: freshly harvested from my grandma`s backyard! No parcelling! (chai!)

THERE! If you dont want it , give it back! LOL.....I know I am not the only one who had made this kinda gaff...Anyways in form four i picked a boy Valentine and got him a nice sweater in the school uniform colours...I was happy to see him wearing it to school....And my Valentine ( Sweetheart Laeti) bought be 3 shirts that she perfumed ..I wore them till i got to University!
Its all about the gesture right??

Pre-marriage Certificate in Cameroon?

Ok so I heard! And it was New Year`s Day ! And my 'Source" must have had like 10 bottles of 33 or whatever he drinks.

Still I felt it was worth mentioning or atleast get your valuable opinion.

It has been noticed in Cameroon by the local courts that marriage annulments/divorces are on a sharp rise. According to him the courts reported a sharp increase in the cancellation of marriages signed in the courts in just one year .According to his narrative, divorce rates are recently on a new high as marriages are  falling apart just after a year or two with  causes ranging from infidelity, incompatibility, infertility, tribalism to the all too familiar Social networks and its evils.

To combat this rise in divorces, according to my source, the Cameroon gov`t plans to pass a law to instate the Pre-Marriage Certificate.. When couples apply for a marriage certificate , they will be issued a Pre-marriage Certificate which will allow them to consummate the marriage  amongst other things ( as if they werent already doing so without gov`t intervention :-)) and allow them to have a 'pre-married status". . Only after successfully staying married for at least 3 years will they be issued a legal marriage certificate .

In your opinion  and of course if this is true will this help combat the problem of increased divorce rates or will they just legalize  " Cam We Stay" ?

Ladies Unaccompanied

Finallly I can Vent!!!

Now someone please tell me if I have a right to be angry or not?

I was in Abuja a couple weeks ago and after work decided to have a drink with my mainest chic in town G-Watson  and catch up on each other`s lives ( well mostly her listening to my bickering about work and my sucky job)..

Since we were in Area 11 ( I know right,,,Ash Town) we decided to pop around the corner and toss back a few Smirnoff`s and some suya. Besides I lived in Area 11 so all u need to do is take a walk down Port Harcourt Crescent  and make a choice amongst the span of joints. The Usual 'Standing Committees' ( ash babes) had already started making their appearance , as early as 6:30pm...A Gurls got to make a living right? I wasnt bothered. Area 11 is notorious for harboring 'standing committees ' and we all know that. No shocker there! At the entrance to the first joint we decided to visit, there were guards at the gate requesting payment . HUH?? ( In my mind I was going...Oil subsidy removal go do wandas! )

Now I would usually pay my fee and ,move in but I the fact that drinking joints now require an entry fee didnt sit well with me..haba now! . My blatant no couldn`t be more resonating ( Call me cheap if you want , Bros na outside we di sitdown...U want make I pay fee to 'enter' outside?). I demanded to know why I have to pay 500naira to sit outside and the guard goes..

 " Madam, All women get to pay before they enter".
  'Why?", I asked, already getting really furious.
"Let`s just go some place else, this is ridiculous," pleaded Georgia. But I was already fuming as the guard responded " Na the price that for any woman unaccompanied by a man".

For a minute there I saw RED!!! " Oya! Call me your Manager!", I wailed! " This is complete and Utter NONSENSE". So pissed off was I , I was determined to tell the ' manager" a piece of my mind and come rain, come shine , this is where I was going to have my beer and so not in the company of any man and I wont pay no 500 naira!!! phew! Let me catch my breathe!

The guys tried to explain that we will be served a drink and its just to discourage the prostitutes from coming in to occupy the tables , thats why they demand 500naira from everywoman....God did that add insult to Injury! I felt a sting in my throat and knew I just might cry from this crap! This is 2012 for crying out loud!

I think thats when I lost the last fibre of civility in me and couldn`t have scolded him any harder. I demanded the manager come and tell me that himself!  Georgia was visibly pissed as well and though we both agreed its better to just leave ..I just couldn`t take this kind of insult and after making way to leave, decided to come back and insist on going into the compound.  When the guards saw that , really we are not ash babes and just needed to chill out and have a drink, finally let us in ( I think another man who was going in also talked to them but I couldn`t see past my anger) .


Now I have one Questtion? How does Making Prostitutes Pay for their entry discourage Prostitution and How difficult is it to differentiate an Ash from an UnAsh babe? Maybe I should start paying attention to the long flowing gowns  and slippers I get into before leaving home...They might be making a diferent statement.

All the same we still downed out drinks and suya and had a good evening......

I Also hear you get to pay to enter into the clubs at Hilton , Sheraton etc if you go as ladies only. 

So Ladies if you are going for a gurl`s night out , be sure to have some cash in your pocketbooks to pay your way in as ' Ladies Unaccompanied".... ...

4days in GHANA...Pure Bliss

Me and my girl G. Watson had been planning this trip for weeks and postponing due to the visit of the president to commission our project. But thanks to heaven November 12th finally arrived and I couldn`t wait to jump out of the office to the airport..

I left the office at a few minutes after 5:00pm rushing to the airport to catch my 5:20pm flight to Lagos so I will have enough time to rest,party a little in Lagos before heading to Accra the next morning. . Thanks to Arik my flight was delayed for 2hrs. After all the rush, twists and turns to beat homeward rush-hour, i finally arrived at the airport, jumped out and ran to the check-in counter only to hear...' Uhh, your plane is still in Abuja'. I said " mr man but I am flying to Lagos" . he said just wait we will call you back in when the plane is on ground.

So off I went to jist with friends and comment on people`s cars in the car park. Strangely enough we didnt hear our plane come in, didnt hear any boarding announcement ..nothing. At about 6:40 I got int to check if we were still travelling to find the entire boarding room completely empty...Rushing back to kiss goodbye to friends and collect my handbag OH BOY did I fall on the tarmac.....my phone shattered into bits ( i barely saved my SIM) my bead bracelet scattered colourful beads across the tar, I bruised my wrist, knees and ooooh so hurt my back. Standing up and cursing under my breath why such things always happen to me i was thanked God it was dark.. But i was so bent on getting on that flight i ignored the pains until i was onboard...""See me see trouble. After paying for my tickets these stupid Arik people want fly leave me?? FIA!!!! lol "
Anyways arrived safe in lag, had some fun at some new club ( forgot the name) and next morning 5:30am en route for MMIA Lagos. After some hassles with the airport guys i finally got myself and Georgia onto the plane and off to Acrra,,,,,,,,,,

Since I had been to Accra before I knew the hotel I wanted to stay in though I had forgotten the name. We didnt have any plan...I hate planned trips....kinda spoils the fun of spontaneiuty


It was pure bliss as I looked out of the plane and saw the beautiful city of Accra once again!! I was here in May 2010 on a working trip and promised Accra and myself to be back for a visit. And visit I did..